Noemi Tovar - MA to Spain

Is it worth it? A year of grieving, a year of loss, a year of fighting, putting things off, avoiding, blaming, complaining, victimizing, confusion, anger, fear…rock-bottom. Six months in, really it was seven consecutive months where I was stripped of all my comforts, challenged by my ever-changing environment and role deprivation given the pandemic.

Who am I? 
What am I doing here?  
What is my purpose here?
 

These are questions that plagued my mind and finally when I couldn’t fight anymore, I understood. I understood what God was doing in me.

Before I came to Spain, God was creating in me a new heart and now that I am in Spain, He is creating in me a new mind. I have been strategically placed in such an unstable environment with a long-standing ministry that’s ever evolving. Change. I don’t like change. But I need to face it, I need to embrace it, I need to live and breathe it.

Is it worth it?

To face the longstanding fears I had that wouldn’t let me move forward was by far the most courageous and brave steps I took this year. Steps that strengthened me to not only walk forward but motivated me to further walk alongside and cling to Jesus’ hand ever so tightly more than I had ever done before.

Is it worth it?

To lose it all in order to gain it all in Christ. For the first time I walked in the shoes of the foreigner, the immigrant, the displaced, the lost, the lonely, the despaired. And I can for the first time say, “I know what it’s like to really walk in your shoes; you are not alone, here is my hand. Let me encourage you and remind you by saying that following Jesus, following the desire to serve that he has placed in your heart, although it may not be the easiest road to walk on - that you will suffer hardships, grief and losses, victory and glory days -  when it is all said and done, it will always be worth it. And the comfort of knowing He is always there is a longstanding promise that will never be broken or shaken.”

To be a first term MA in a pandemic has taught me what I might not have learned during any other time. The best place I could’ve been is right where God wanted me to be - in Madrid, Spain. And it was very much worth it. 

This blog is part of the Join the Movement series. If you are interested in receiving this newsletter monthly, click “Join the Movement” at the top of our website. If you are interested to serve as an MA like Noemi, go to www.wideopenmissions.org for more info.